I watched a TV show last week and I have to say that I wasn’t impressed… A young woman had recorded a number of reasons why she killed herself. The reasons were shared posthumously. However, I believe that there was one reason, the only reason, that she omitted: because she chose to.
The society that we live in today is rife with blame culture. I’m pretty sure you can come up with your own examples… and I’m not talking about accountability for accidents that’s never should have happened. I’m talking about people making their own choices and blaming others for the consequence or even individuals blaming themselves for situations that are out of their control.
Anyway, I watched this young woman scream at her peers and people wanting to help to “leave her alone”, then, she blamed them for not coming after her. I heard her say she was going to get help then watched scenes wherein the words “I need help” were never uttered. She then went on to blame them for not knowing that she needed it. She chose not to let them know, she chose to keep quiet and in the end it was her choice that ended her life.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been the girl that has pushed people away and expected them to come running. I’ve been the girl makes herself lost; hoping to be found. But I never was, not until I stopped hiding.
Some situations you are in may cause you to feel low, your genetics may cause you to feel low. Life being life means that lows will come but defining moments in your life (and the lives of others!) will occur based on the choices you make. Having said that it’s important to make the right choice.
The young lady in the show chose to isolate herself and, as a result of her isolation, chose to end her life.
I’ve made the choice to stop believing that my family and friends were mind readers. I’ve made the choice to try and give myself a purpose for each day. I’ve made the choice to no longer allow my lows to consume my highs. I’ve made the choice to adopt an attitude of hope. I’m not perfect at it and it’s not easy and I’m not saying it will be but everyday is a fresh start (I know I’ve said it before but it’s true). You have to choose to help yourself and I can’t imagine that choice to have a negative effect on your life.
So, whilst there are some aspects in life that you have no say in, the choices you make can help influence your experience. Stop relying on people to read your mind and fix you. Rather make the choice to work with those who want to help you and chose you help yourself. You know, the right kind of choice.
** If you are feeling suicidal, passive (I wouldn’t mind if I didn’t wake up tomorrow) or aggressive (contemplating the deed) please, please speak to someone.
**If your lows are preventing you from being you, please, speak to someone